Cashier Adventures

20 10 2012

Sometimes, things happen to you at the precise moment that you need it.  You know?  After my last really depressing post, I’ll share you a little tidbit about something that happened yesterday.  No, not that.

Anyways, I had to work yesterday.  A normal 10-4 shift.  Love those things.  Normally.  Anyways, my boss lady was training 3 people, count em, 3 people last night.  Well, that’s all fine and dandy, but the front end was short-handed anyways.  So with her focused on training, it becomes evident that one of the cashiers is gonna have to stay a little later than they planned.  Me.

At first, I figured it would just be a few minutes, since my boss lady did say “a few minutes.”  Apparently, 7:35 pm is 4 o’clock pm.  But I am not going to complain about my boss, because that’s a little unprofessional, and at the end of the day, yes it sucked to pull a 9 hour day, but I could use the money.  Especially now that everything in my life seems to be breaking.

Anyways, so I was staying late.  I believe that if you ever have the reason or rationale to be rude while working in the general public, it is when you’re having to stay later than normal.

One of the problems that cashiers run into is product that slips in under the belt.  This is quite a frequent problem, most commonly experienced with the packets of seasoning used to make stuff, such as ranch dip.  As a cashier, I always make suggestions that make this problem less likely to occur.  I feel that it’s usually for the better to do so, because people don’t realize that these packets slip in under the belt.  If I were not observant or if we get to talking, that packet is liable to go in under the belt and the customer will leave without product.  So I always tell the customer, “Hey, for next time, if you’ll put the packet on the top of so-and-so, it won’t fall in between the belt.”  This lady came in at about 5:30, and told me that “That’s not my problem.” And subsequently, proceeded to chew me out for being so bossy and rude to her, and cussed me out when I told her to have a nice day.

It made me so mad.

Rude people just make me very mad in general.

As a disclaimer, 99% of the customers at my store are awesome.  They truly are.  They chat with me, and our regulars always ask how I’m doing, and what’s going on in my life.  I love them.  It’s a mindless job, but they are wonderful at keeping me entertained.  I even have customers who will stand in line as long as they will, simply because they like coming in my line.

When this lady left, I couldn’t help but to just self-doubt myself.  The thoughts running through my head included how terrible I was at my job, how I was never going anywhere with it, and how I needed to do better.  I was almost at the brink of crying, that’s how much she hurt me to my core.

About an hour later, another lady came in.  She was pleasant, answered my questions, asked how my day was going, and at the end, she thanked me.  She said, “After a day like today, I just needed to see a polite person.”  And left.  Call it God or whatever, but I just needed that.

I think I will start thanking my customers that are polite to me.

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Anniversaries

16 10 2012

I was hit by a random thought the other day, and it’s haunted me ever since.  So I thought I would share here.

Recently, I realized that an anniversary of an event is approaching.  It’s crazy.  What happened, I really don’t feel like fully divulging all of the details, but there were hearts broken, and I honestly never thought that so much time would have passed, and things would still remain the way they are.  Hearts are still broken, and even when I see familiar people connected to this event, there’s like a canyon of things that I cannot fully ever express.  It’s like we both know that things will never be the same.  Hugs are given, but yet the valley of distance is between us, and will permanently remain between us because it’s just too painful to move on and to move forward.  Because moving on and moving forward, seems to say that the event was not important or the missing piece that is there….wasn’t important.  And nothing could be further than the truth.

How do I feel?  That’s the million dollar question people like to ask.  Or, “How are you doing?” is an old favorite as well.  To answer, in a sense, I am doing better than I’ve ever been in my life.  But in a sense, the hurt is still as fresh as the eternally open wound that continues to spew forth my innards.  Sorry, that’s quite the imagery, isn’t it?  I feel jaded in some ways.  But in other ways, I feel like somehow, even if it’s cosmically, the situation had never happened, and we’re still together, two happy peas in a contradictory pod.

But an anniversary is here.  And if all the people connected to that situation were reading this, I would have to imagine saying to them that my life is made better now that the time has passed.  Sure, at first there was heartbreak and much crying. But now, I see things clearly and in a more balanced way.  I am able to give myself grace in the situation.  And I am proud that I handled it the way I did.  Sure, it could’ve been handled in a more mature fashion, but for once in my life, I had a genuine emotion, and I used that emotion, expressed it, and told someone how I really felt.  I allowed myself to feel all of the complicated emotions and didn’t just push them away.  In a sense, I was more me at once, than I hardly ever am.

The old adage is “TIme heals all wounds.”  I disagree.  There are some wounds that just never do heal.  Sure, you’ve scarred a little bit, but it’s a daily, conscious decision to carry on with your life and not be defeated by what happened.  The emotions associated with the passing of time, with the events and the people that it concerns…they never go away, we just sorta push them deep down, and then we numb ourselves to the repetition of the event.

But the best thing of all of this?  The lessons learned.   By far, the best thing that has happened me.  As a result, I am freer to give myself grace, and allow myself space to deal with things.  I value my relationships more, and I am ever so grateful that I have such friends who have remained with me despite the passage of time.  I am quicker to express my emotions and remind friends that I love them very much.  I am more thankful for what I have.  And I can give space for people to be human, it is easier for me to forgive.

So I suppose remembering the anniversaries are a good thing.  Besides being a little bitter about how the way things ended, it gives me the space to realize that I don’t have to be bitter.  I am better off than I was before it happened.  Sure, I miss what was taken from me, but I have to believe that in some way, even if just in my head, the relationship still persists, and I am still as very much present in their life as I was.

So, is it better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all?





MIA-Life Lately

10 10 2012

Hey folks!  I am alive and well.  I promise.  My laptop has decided that it’s going to die and so, suddenly, I am without a regular internet connection.  All I do is work anyways, so I’m really not missing all that much. 

Someone asked me at work today, “How do you go about life without the internet?”  Now mind you, this was a rather youthful lady, who opened our conversation at work with a question about facebook.  And I simply told her that I was disconnected from the internet as of current days.  She looked absolutely horrified.  Like, for reals.  Totally. 

At first, I missed it.  But then I realized, it’s been very cleansing to unplug from the world and to just live reality.  In the meantime, I am with friends, either on the phone or face to face.  And new relationships are forming, and it’s all just so very exciting! 

More than that, I am just so grateful with where I am right now.  So many things have orchestrated themselves to be right here, in the present day, and I am just so grateful for all that has happened. 

So stay tuned, I’ve got some sweet thoughts a brewing!