21 06 2014

There’s a comic out there, titled “The Flintstones See the Grand Canyon.”  And it’s this picture of Fred, Wilma, and Barney and Barney’s wife (whose name escapes me right now), and they’re standing, watching a river flow.  I saw a GIF once, but I haven’t seen it since.  

I’ve never been to the Grand Canyon.  I’ve never seen the beauty and the majesty and the wonder of how many, many years, the river eroded rock, ate away at the formations, until we have the canyons that we have today.  And visitors from all over the world, flock to see this thing.  People have told me that it’s just an awesome sight to see.  Little by little, years upon years…ate up this rock, until it forms something spectacular.

In this life, we’re all bound for some hurt, some heartache.  Little frustrations that pop up along the way.  We’re all bound for some trouble that causes our lives to shift, to change.  Sometimes, it hardens our hearts, toughens our resolves.  And sometimes we encounter something that forces us to soften ourselves, to open our hearts to love, to be able to love people again, and give them a second chance.  Sometimes, that love is enough to start rebuilding the damage the canyons have wrought.  Sometimes, that love is healing enough to force us to be grateful to the point that we realize we’ve got nothing to lose, if we are to turn from the ways of our lives and move forward in a different direction.  

Reflecting upon canyons, I look at my heart and at my life.  My heart, like my body, holds some scars.  Where on my wrist, is a scarred “7”, it reminds me of what happens when you trust the wrong person.  I’ve got a scar on my head, a bald spot where hair no longer grows, to remind me that sometimes, no matter what happens, some hurts can’t be fixed, and they’ll never be the same.  I have a scar on my arm that is recent, it reminds me of sometimes, you get hurt, even when you’re trying to do the right thing.  There’s a scar on my knee, that I got when I was doing something stupid, and I got myself hurt by being an idiot.  There’s a scar on my right hand, where I knew that even though I was hurt, I was protected, and didn’t have to worry about losing my life. There’s a permanent hollow in my chest, where I remember the loss of death.  There’s one that reminds me of when someone left.  There’s one that reminds me of how much I struggled to make things work.  There’s one that symbolizes failure to me.  One is a common scar, accidental, but still shared.  

I’m not in the business of harming my body.  Like I said, not all scars are on the body. some take place in the heart.  

But time, and distance from all of these situations and circumstances…it reminds me of the canyon.  I’m in for a hard, but good life.  I know this because I have experienced this myself already.  But you know what?  I can’t focus on how hard my life is or how hurt I’ve been in this lifetime.  Doing so, would invite the demon of bitterness to invade my heart, and that demon, it’s pretty hard to get free of.  I’ve met a truly bitter person…and it was not a beautiful sight.  They couldn’t experience and feel love in any shape or form.  And they won’t, until they stop romancing the bitter demon.  I don’t want to be like that.  What makes me not to be like that is the perspective that I have of my life.  As I stand back, and look, I can see little ways where these scars, both physical and emotional, have made me something of a Grand Canyon.  7 is my number.  The one on my head?  It’s my favorite itchy part.  The one on my knee?  Kinda reminds me of the surface of the moon.  The ache in my heart?  It’s an essential story of knowing me.  When you look at me, you see someone who has learned to make beauty from the ashes, find something good to focus on, and not the heartache.  

What are your scars?  How do they tell a story of your life?  Make them into a canyon.  Years of work and reflection coming to a point of instruction and processing.  

Don’t float through life, waiting for the next thing.  Don’t shut your mind off.  Process, think.  There’s more to you than simply allowing bitterness to take over, or your life to just be lived.  There’s learning to be had.




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